and i am a weapon of massive consumption

[priorcommitment]

In the time that Ishiah's known Okumura Rin, he's quickly learned that the young boy isn't someone who learns by theory or instruction, but instead through practice. To someone who has had the skill built into his mind by design, trying to find ways to ramp Rin up in the ways of swordfighting is difficult. Extracting his power in a manageable way, even more so.

But the more time Ishiah spends with the young boy, the more he comes to realize the depth of the power and potential in him. In the short term, Rin needs to be able to harness that power for good; in the long run, Ishiah would prefer to be someone who knows those abilities inside and out, in the event that he ever has to fight them directly.

The situation reminds him of Caliban's in more ways than one.

Ishiah makes his way over to an abandoned warehouse out beyond the suburbs, wanting the privacy and space necessary for Rin to speak frankly about his power. In time, he plans to make the very same trip with Rin's brother, not entirely convinced that Okumura Yukio is as fully human as he would have others believe. But in the few interactions he's had with both brothers, it's clear that being in one another's presence makes both of them hold back in ways.

"Rin," he says, lifting his gaze when he hears steps echo within the wide walls of the main room. "Thank you for taking the time to join me."

Comments

[phosphor]

"It's no problem," Rin says, voice still softly uncertain, but polite, in its own, particular way. Gone is the standoffish tone that Rin had initially taken with Ishiah, replaced with something not quite meek, not quite friendly either. He lifts a hand to scrub at the back of his neck as he cross the distance, the tip of his tail giving a twitch in curiosity.

His other hand grips Kurikara in its sheathe loosely at his hip. He keeps the sword at his side as much as possible, again. Since Yukio's arrival, there had been too many shakeups. Enough that his father's warning weighs on his conscience. Never set it aside.

[priorcommitment]

"Recently," Ishiah begins without preamble or pause, "there have been developments in the city which have called to my attention the fact that we aren't prepared as a group for the threats that may come our way. Beyond a need to assemble the more able-bodied members of our community together, which I'm not equipped to do at present, I thought I might reach out to those with significant power whom I am acquainted with."

Ishiah's hand falls casually to the hilt of the sword by his hip, no plans to draw it yet. Instead, a mirror of Rin's own movement.

"You have a lot of power, but I imagine you've been holding some of it back. How far are you prepared to go in the event that something happens to Darrow?"

[phosphor]

Rin lowers his head, before lifting it again to face Ishiah, dark blue eyes meeting a much paler pair. He'd never expected a conversation like this to sneak up on him, certainly not after Yukio's arrival in the city. Yukio didn't want Rin prepared to do anything but protect himself. If Yukio had his way, Rin knows, he wouldn't even be responsible for that much.

The part of him that's still a scared child, that still wishes his old man were around to stand between him and a frightened world, is comforted by that, however subconsciously. Every other part of Rin feels a rush of resentment.

"I ... don't know," Rin admits, his hands clenching at his sides before he relaxes his fingers again. "I want to say I'd do anything. That I want to help as many people as possible with my life." So that he can know it was worth keeping. So that he can know he had a right to ever exist at all. "But it's complicated. The power that I've got is complicated. It's not something that's totally under my control. It's something that can hurt people. It could just make things worse, if it came down to it. If I used all of it."

[priorcommitment]

"It has always been my opinion that the only way to address a complicated power is to try one's best to understand it. If the risks prove to be too great, withholding makes sense. But holding back thanks to an inability to understand lacks responsibility," shares Ishiah, who doesn't soften his gaze, even as he notices Rin squirming uncomfortably under the attention.

He has no doubt that Rin's had plenty of talks with that brother of his.

Brotherhood among humans seems to come with a few common themes.

"Let's put aside talk of motivation for the moment. You say that your power could make things worse if you used all of it. Is this complete conjecture, or have you slipped towards that state before?"

[phosphor]

Rin takes Ishiah's lecture seriously, despite the pinched expression that flutters over his pointed features. Rin nearly always does take these sort of concerns seriously. He hadn't when he'd first come into his powers. Too many mistakes had changed his bullheadedness to constant worry, somewhere along the way. Maybe he still couldn't get along with Yukio, but even with his brother, Rin is willing to take direction.

"It's ... happened before. It's happened twice. The first time it happened, I totally lost myself I lost everything. I don't even remember what I did, everything just went .. blue. For hours, it felt like. The second time, I managed to come back, right before I tipped over. Or maybe that's not right. I think I did tip over. I was just. Aware of it. If I'd have let myself go, I don't think anybody ... "

He wouldn't have been a hero, at the very least. Rin gives a grim hang of his head.

[priorcommitment]

"It's fortunate that you were able to hold yourself back, even if only just," Ishiah says thoughtfully, brows pinching further. Everything that Rin shares now suggests that relying on his power would be leading Rin down a harmful path — but Ishiah can't help but wonder if that's simply because Rin hasn't been properly trained in the discipline and emotional control necessary to direct the force of his power.

Perhaps that's opportunistic of him.

"What were the circumstances leading up to the first time? Even if you don't remember what happened during, surely there was something which triggered you. Was there anyone around to witness it happening?"

[phosphor]

"My friends," Rin tells Ishiah, the tip of his tail giving a thoughtful, uncomfortable quirk as he sends his memory back to the fight in the woods during their training camp. "There was a demon that attacked our training group. He was hurting my friends. He broke Koneko's arm and was holding Shiemi hostage."

Even at the though, with the actual struggle far behind him, Rin's face pinches and flushes with anger, directed at Amaimon. Even realizing that he's outclassed where he is now, his fingers itch for a re-match. That fact alone scares Rin.

He really needs to ... stop being so afraid.

At least, that's what Mephisto's been telling him.

"After we got into it, it was only a couple minutes before I was totally out of control. I probably would have kept going until .. I don't know. If Mephisto hadn't stopped me, I'd have kept going like that. It's just like when I was a kid, except when I was a kid, all I could do was scream and throw things."

[priorcommitment]

"And are any of these friends within the city?" Ishiah asks, even as his mind goes at once to Yukio, wondering if that's part of the reason for Yukio's sobered and strict approach to the topic. Niko was much of the same, Ishiah suspects, after having seen Caliban give in or bend to the more chaotic half of his background. Niko's never shared the story with him directly, but Ishiah knows bits and pieces from Robin, pieced together over the many evenings spent talking at length about the boys.

He knows that Caliban was once taken, almost as though to reeducate him, and that Niko saw the immediate impact of that time spent away.

"I ask these questions because I do still think it'd be a valuable exercise to see what going to that level of power really does both to your mind and your body. You say that Mephisto was able to stop you. An interesting name — am I to take it that he is, in fact, the demon himself? It seems interesting that a demon was able to stop your behavior from going too far."

[phosphor]

"No," Rin said, shaking his head. None of his other friends were in Darrow -- only Yukio was there with him. He sobered at the thought of Mephisto. He still mostly referred to him as Mephisto in practice, but he knew that his identity went far beyond that.


"He said he was a lot of things. Mephistopheles, Raven, Samael. He's really powerful. One of the strongest demons in Gehenna." And Rin believed that to be true, from what he'd witnessed. "But I don't know what his deal is. He works for the Vatican, he's one of the twelve Arc Knights. He was able to keep me contained until I calmed down."

[priorcommitment]

Samael. That's interesting.

Ishiah crosses his arms over his chest as he considers Rin's words. The line between demons and angels must be even more muted in Rin's world, if not nonexistent altogether. Certainly, the status as angel or demon doesn't seem to have as clear of a link with motivation and alliance, as it does in Ishiah's world. Rin stands in front of him, not having done anything to merit falling, not even having had the awareness for most of his life. And yet, he's a half demon.

More than anything else, this is why Ishiah feels the need to steer him in a positive direction.

"I'm unfamiliar with the concept of an Arc Knight, but the idea that someone like him would obscure his motivations doesn't come as a surprise. A demon working for the Vatican. There's a sentence I never thought I'd say," muses Ishiah, stepping along the perimeter of the room. "Everything so far makes it sound like your emotions are what control your powers, rather than your mind. That is something I would like to help you work past."

[phosphor]

"Work past?" Rin asks, and does his best to hide the pout that came to his mouth at the feel of the words. What was he supposed to be working past, exactly?

"But wanting to protect my friends is what's keeping me around. How I feel about people is what's keeping me strong, isn't it?"

He knit his brows together and stared up at Ishiah's tall, imposing presence. He might have been intimidated, some time ago, but he'd come to know Ishiah, and trust him -- for better or worse. He no longer seemed like an aloof authority, but someone Rin could talk to ... when Yukio refused to really listen.

[priorcommitment]

"There is a difference between being motivated by the devotion you feel to your friends and family, and letting your actions be controlled by that emotion. How you feel about people doesn't have to change, but you won't do yourself or your friends any favors by relying on that anger or agitation to call your power," Ishiah points outs, glancing down at the young man, who wears a hesitantly determined expression.

"I imagine your brother might have given you similar advice before. What I worry about is two-fold — your sense of judgment when you're acting off of passion, and this potential of falling prey to your powers. It's happened before. Do you feel very much in control when you're exercising more of your power?"

[phosphor]

"A little more." Rin can admit it honestly. "Mephisto told me that I lack control because I'm afraid. But of course I'm afraid. How the hell do you not be afraid of something like that?"

He lowers his face, narrowing his eyes.

"I know I can save people, but that power can still hurt people if I let it get out of control. I can be confident. But nobody's confident all of the time."

[priorcommitment]

"I haven't witnessed enough of your power to say whether I would consider you confident or afraid while wielding it. But Mephisto has a point. You should be cautious about how you use your power, but fear of power itself has never helped hone anyone's skill," Ishiah says, watching closely as the boy's stance grows dejected, his shoulders slumping slightly.

"Any kind of power can hurt people if it's allowed to get out of control. The source of your power doesn't make that as different as you think."

He lowers his hand to the hilt of his sword. "I do want you to try. Letting it all out. I have confidence that I'll be able to stop you if things get out of hand."

[phosphor]

"I ... " Rin trails off, looking between Ishiah's hand and his sword with a strange kind of fear. Rin isn't afraid that he will be hurt He is afraid of what will happen if he isn't. He can scarcely find words to communicate what he experiences at the thought of doing something like Ishiah is suggesting. Even when he'd been soundly beaten the second time, fighting with Amaimon ... had not been unpleasant Only losing had been. Rin doesn't want to lose a second time.

Even knowing that it shouldn't, he feels satisfied, when all of the power that he has within him is drawn out. There is a part, which he does not want to recognize, which only has contempt for the way he's been handling himself.

Rin is terrified of that part.

"How much confidence?" he asks, boldly honest Rin doesn't speak from ego; only caution.

[priorcommitment]

Ishiah's gaze trails down to Rin's sword. If Rin were to unleash all of his power at full force, Ishiah doesn't doubt that he'd be overwhelmed, and easily. While his experience gives him a fair amount of upper hand in a battle, the truth of the matter is that he's still barely above the speed and strength of a human at peak condition. Any abilities outside of that have been dampened ever since he made the choice to become peri.

If he keeps training Rin, someday, the idea of a battle between them will become a matter of course.

But Rin's lack of basic training and uncertain will make Ishiah confident that he has the upper hand. For now.

He releases his wings in a flash of heat, white and gold barred, spanning impressively as his hand drops the hilt of his sword.

"Confident enough."

[phosphor]

Something about the sudden, flashy display of Ishiah's wings, like something straight out of a stained glass window, pisses Rin off a little, in turn with Ishiah's unwavering confidence. Pisses him off enough that he doesn't reconsider, slipping Kurikara out of its sheathe with a small gasp. Having the sword unsealed -- having that part of himself unsealed -- makes him even more uneasy about Ishiah as a presence.

He trusts Ishiah. The crawl in his skin doesn't.

Rin shifts his grip on the blade, before springing forward to jab at his target. Enough practice with Shura has made him confident enough to swing without worry that he might hurt Ishiah. They are allies. But Ishiah is a stronger swordsman than Rin is, as Shura was, and if he's to learn anything, he can't hold back against a better.

He grist his teeth, gathering his strength behind him. Overpowering an opponent is about the only option that Rin usually feels he has. Even after training with Rukia for so long, his instinct will always be to go in strong and hope he finishes that way as well.

He lets out a deep growl when their swords meet, the impact racing up his arms and into his teeth.

[priorcommitment]

Ishiah's eyes widen immediately, roving over Rin's form. Not entirely clumsy, and appropriate for the weapon he bears — it's probably the work of the reaper training Rin. Even though Ishiah's plan would normally be to evade the attack, were he fighting in earnest, he needs to have some idea of the scale of Rin's strength.

So he stands in place, bracing his arms as Rin's blow spreads through his entire body, the scrape of metal rushing all the way to the tip of his wings.

"So you draw on your power for brute strength. Just striking wherever the sweep of your arm takes you. That won't work in many cases. You need to develop your instinct," Ishiah says, his arms quaking as he continues meeting hit after hit, then ducks to the side with a sweep of his wings, gaze fixed and waiting to gauge Rin's reflexes.